friend Sy gave me 'the Dream Giver.' and i've read most of it. huh....
well, i already know what my dream is. i want to write. i want to publish. i want to change the world with my writing. i'm happiest writing. i'm happiest when someone says, wow that was really good. and i already know it was good. i know i'm good. but...
the book asked the question: what are you willing to sacrifice?
nothing.
i'm not willing to sacrifice anything.
it would mean so much more to me to be there for my family. to see dan and jackson's dreams come true. to help other people achieve their dreams. i'm not willing to sacrifice time with my family to be selfish and do what i love to do.
why doesn't that sound right?
rockstar hubby told me that i needed to make it happen. that what if just one person read what i wrote and it changed their lives? but how can i possibly justify my away time from my family that i've devoted my time to?
my mind is whirling in insane circles and i don't know what to do.
but my heart aches at the idea of not writing.
so now what?
(i'm not asking a question, i'm just leaving it open to the universe)
7 comments:
I read that book too and I only read most of it. Mostly the first part. Gave up on the second half as I came to the point of realizing that my Big Dream was to help B & B realize their Big Dreams. But then, I don't have a dream of my own like you do. I wonder if there is a way you can do both.
How is it selfish to follow your dreams? What if your fulfilling your dreams inspired and influenced your son? Why does there need to be a choice between your dreams and your hubby's and son's dreams? How could you work them all in together? What if fulfilling your dreams made you a better wife and mother?
And it doesn't have to be all-or-nothing. Perhaps sacrificing some time, dropping Lost or something ;-)
Don't think you can't follow your dream. God gave it to you for a reason.
You are an amazing writer, and other people need to enjoy your gift. I know I do.
Ditto to barb. Though, I've only read your blogs.
It sounds like you are trying to think of things to sacrifice and the only thing you think of that which is dearest to you, your family.
My instinct is to say that you don't need to think of things to sacrifice. The time will come when God asks you to sacrifice something - that's when you have a choice. In the meantime, do what God is telling you to do now. It falls under the do not worry about tomorrow thing. And, if the concern stays - pray that when the time comes your will is aligned with His. Because, sacrifice does not always have to be painful; sometimes it is realizing that this thing we hung onto isn't really that important. But, that's just my thoughts on an unasked question ;). So, grain of salt.
Sorry, I've got to write to goaliemom. I don't know how else to do that.
You have a dream of your own. Your dream is to help others realize theirs. That is the sign of a true encourager and a selfless heart. I've read your blog responses :) - you're gifted and I can tell it isn't just B & B you are helping, but all those you come into contact with.
Futsaldreamer... thank you. That was very encouraging to hear. I think you gave me a sense of clarity I was missing. Now I know what my dream is! And I like it!
Do you go to Sequoia?? Maybe I could meet you on Sunday.
GM, I've told futsaldreamer many a time that she is the Encouragement Queen! See, it's still true!
I love how entire conversations get going in blog responses.
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