Er...

As the gaffer and I left the grocery store, an elderly woman passed by us. She said, "pardon me, little one" to the gaffer.
The gaffer turned to look at me:
G: why did she say, pardon me one-one?
Me: no, she said, pardon me little one.
G: I'm not that little!
Me: no, you're not, but you're littler than she is
G: (looking at the back of her as she walks away) She has a fat bum!


Cue biting of tongue and trying to keep straight face as I give him the hairy eyeball.