Serendipity

Alcohol

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Thu, 07 Jan 2010 00:00:00 +0000

me: What did you make there, bud?

gaffer: it's a robot that turns into a gun.

me: oh, that's neat.

gaffer: His name is Alcohol.

me: What?!

gaffer: It's because his dad used to drink a lot and he made a lot of bad choices...

ah, the pride.

Tree is almost down

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Mon, 04 Jan 2010 22:04:00 +0000

But it seems to take 4 days to get it all down. Too lazy I think.

Gaffer's first day back at school. Two conversations I had to record for prosperity.

Gaffer: Hey Haley, want to see the gun show?

Haley: Teacher! Gaffer is talking about guns!

Gaffer: No, the gun SHOW! See? (kisses biceps)

Later on during drama...

Teacher: Ok everyone, let's pretend we're eating Christmas dinner! Ok, now we're all tired because we ate so much!

Gaffer: I'm actually not tired. I ate everything in moderation.

Teacher 2: Did he just say 'moderation'?

Teacher 1: Yes, yes he did.

Ah, the pride!

New ideas spinning around head:

-party ideas for book launch
-where to go for vacation this June. Rent a cottage/condo in Florida? Anywhere hot and near ocean?
-debating buying land and building new house in two years.

The idea of moving doesn't even faze me. I'm so used to it. I mean, the longest I've stayed in a house since I was 18, which would be awhile ago, is 4 years. And that was only one house. The rest of them have meant moving yearly or monthly. But RockStar Hubby is thinking about land. And a home. With a rink. And a pool. And acreage. Should probably fix this one up to par first...

Happy New Year

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Fri, 01 Jan 2010 14:57:00 +0000

Yes, it's that time of year where everyone blogs about their resolutions, what they'd like to change, blah blah.
Well, I'm doing one too.

I don't really have any resolutions, because I always mess them up. I think I'll call them goals.

1- I want to get down to 135lbs. As of two days ago, it would be 15 pounds to lose. But given it was that time of the month, I may have gained a few. Let me go check right now. Oof. Nope, 150. Too much Christmas junk I think. I begged rockstar hubby to buy me some 10lb weights (yes, I may be a tad over, but I've got the guns already baby. If I wanted to push it, I would have asked for 25 pounders. I'm just saying...bragging) and I have a ball in the basement. No excuses. And for the first time ever, I'm going to write down everything I eat. And cut back on lattes. No really, I know you laugh, but I was up to two a day. So comforting in this cold weather. But RSH has discovered Teaopia and it's amazing! It sounds ridiculous to have a shop just focused on tea, but it has 100 different teas, all loose leaf and I'm happy to tell you that my earl gray that I normally throw 2 tbsp of sugar in, tastes AMAZING without the sugar! So creamy and sweet. I think it's because there aren't any checmicals...regardless, 15 pounds. By April 15th.
2- I want better quiet times with God. So I've set up my library and will be brewing my teaopia and coming in here to attack it with passion. And possibly blog about it now that I have a new notebook upstairs. To write my new book with. Um..
3- Venture out the house more. I've become a bit of a homebody, which means I haven't really been interacting with people, making new friends. Email is way too convenient. So I'm going to try and have coffee with someone new, once a month. At least.
4- Start another book. I have no idea what's going to happen with this one, but it's not even coming out until Christmas. I have eleven months to go. That's 335 days-ish. So do I start the prequel or something entirely different? No idea, but I must write daily.
5- Have an amazing time in Atlanta. I'm so nervous because I don't know what to expect, and being a control-freak that makes me a little crazy, but I'm going to pray for patience and guidance and just have a great time. We're rebuilding homes of people who need God and who need help. I kind of hope I'm cooking again because I love cooking, but we'll see.
6- Have an amazing time in Paris. I'm nervous about that too. So far away. For a week. In a new culture. All alone with RSH. Well, at least he's a grown up. He'll take care of me.
7- Grow up a little. Not too much though. I mean...I'm timid. Wait that doesn't sound right, stop laughing. I want the 'balls' to say 'no' to telemarketers, to say 'no' to things I don't really want to do and to tell friends when they hurt my feelings or do something awful like neglect my birthday or that I even exist. Why do I have friends like that? See #3. And before you get all weird on me, I'm not having a pity party. I just want to be more brave. I hate confrontations and I hate telling me that they've hurt me. This year, I will. Maybe.
8- Drink more tea.
9- Get RSH to read a book. The man will not read. He reads the bible and for that, I'm grateful. He's read my books, all two of them. But I want him to like reading. I broke out the last Harry Potter to bribe him. It's not working. Yet.
10- Try a new recipe a week. Read my cooking magazines and leave the fashion ones alone. For now.
11- Because I need something for the gaffer: teach him flowers this year. Don't ask.

Ok, I have to go because I need to drink my tea and do my quiet time before The Office marathon starts.
Happy New Year

Happy New Year

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Tue, 29 Dec 2009 22:29:00 +0000

It's been awhile, blah blah, sorry I haven't blogged, etc...

Now that that's done with:

December has been a bit crazy. Starting with the book. The book of mine which will be published next Christmas. A little exciting. I've already done the first edits and am waiting a little impatiently for the next set. I was promised it would be done before Christmas, but I kinda knew that wouldn't happen. And that's ok. Because I really have no idea what to do after that.
I got to see the illustrator, who is incredibly talented and I'm still waiting to see the cover of the book.
Hm..a lot of waiting.

Christmas was lovely, but quiet. Rockstar Hubby managed to work the nights leading up to Christmas, had the eve off, but then back at work the next two nights. Which meant I stared at the tv a lot. Sad, but true.

I did buy a new notebook, which I haven't really played with because it doesn't have any new things to do on it, with the exception of it being smaller.
I did book our tickets to Paris in May. And booked the apartment. Oh my, oh my. And I bought tickets to Atlanta for a rebuild of homes with Disaster Relief. Hm...so much going on.
Ah fudge. Gotta cook the spaghetti

cocoon

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 03:19:00 +0000

I function better when I live in my cocoon.

My entire life I've spent living within my cocoon.
Everything would happen outside of it, and I would just pay attention to the inside.

Not in a selfish, mean manner, don't get me wrong. I just could never handle the truth.

And tonight I'm 'seeing' a lot of the truth. And the truth is awful.

I find myself wondering if the war is working. If women are finding themselves in worse conditions or better. I want to yell at the arrogant people who are saying it's a waste of time. Is it?

I find myself wondering how women are still surviving everywhere, just from the way men treat them. This isn't a 'feminist' thing, I just realized tonight that probably 90% of women believe that they are not worth it. And the way that some man has treated them. It breaks my heart and it makes me so angry.

And so I'm upstairs, hubby at work of course, I only have meltdowns when he's not home...and I feel so wretchedly sick to my stomach. To think of the pain, and the harshness going on out there. And here I am in my comfortable home, wondering whether or not we can afford a new couch.

And this is why I stay in my bubble. Because if I don't, I am racked with constant grief and my heart breaking.

I am so ignorant.

A little more conversation, a little less action please...

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 00:01:00 +0000

Too tired!

Life is...I had it down past during the summer. I had it figured out. We didn't have time schedules, we could nap if we wanted, spend the entire afternoon playing in the backyard in the kiddie pool eating rice crisps, or tending the tomatoes...We could go hang out at the grocery store, walk to get ice cream when it was hot. So simple.
Now...

I am having such a hard time finding my groove. The gaffer is 5. He's in SK. He goes to school 3 times a week. He has swimming lessons twice a week. I was excited to have all this time to myself. To 'get things done'. The only thing I've gotten done on my list is get rockstar hubby to hang up a lantern over the fireplace. And that was only today after I harassed him for about ten minutes about it. Which took a trip to home depot to buy anchors to screw the bracket to the wall. But it's very pretty.
I vaguely have my library ready. In quiet wallowing, I had a garage sale and sold all of my baby items. Then I turned the nursery into a library. I bought a huge bookshelf with cubbies and put it right in the middle of the room to be a divider, so that I have a cubby to write in. I purchased a lavender desk to write on. I'm still looking for that perfectly comfy chair but I don't think Bombay Company is something I can afford. But it's not done yet. I'm tempted to paint the room a chocolate brown as it is right now a light blue. Which was the gaffer's original room, but it faces north, so this summer we moved him into the yellow room which faces the backyard and gets sun for about 8 hours. I love to watch him sit in the sunlight and build something brilliant with his lego.
I'm trying to organize my house. I still don't have a place for everything and with all of the things that need to be done (ie laundry, bathrooms, laundry, making food, laundry) it hasn't been done. Which means my house is kind of a disaster. And it needs to be organized. For me. For my sanity.

Because in the middle of November, I'm getting my manuscript back. Macro-edited. Because I scored a deal with Zondervan.
Let's all take a moment to scream.

Ok, that being said, yes, I am ridiculously excited. But I have no idea what to expect. I can't imagine writing and re-writing for three days while the gaffer is at school, when I can't find time to sweep my floors now. My days off are non-existent! And I am beginning to suffer...badly.

But I have a book deal...

and the lantern looks lovely.

the five year old's perspective

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 14:08:00 +0000

"when I bounce, my pe*** always wiggles."

and now for your viewing pleasure...

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 13:38:00 +0000

this is why I married him.

The gaffer is 5

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 13:26:00 +0000

Yesterday, the gaffer turned 5.
I'd like to say it was a monumentous occasion, but we were camping, and it was actually awful. Due to wasp stings, bugs in the eye, mosquito bites, not sleeping all night because it was freezing, he was in prime form with the whining, tantruming and crying.
I felt so blessed.

But now, the next morning, after a decent night's sleep, as he watches star wars in the other room while I try to get my house in order, I'm having a moment.

It doesn't help that I'm washing baby food jars. Because I make muffins out of their squash because I couldn't be bothered to cook my own.

Before he was born, I didn't want him. And then God said, you need kids. And we got pregnant that week.
I didn't enjoy pregnancy, even though I wasn't sick, I wasn't exhausted...I just, didn't like it.
I didn't enjoy the labour.
I didn't enjoy him the first 6 weeks. In fact, I realize now that I was suffering from postpartum. Who knew?
And then at two months, I fell in love. Actually, I was watching 'Cold Mountain' and the part with Natalie Portman? Where the soldiers come? And demand food? And she doesn't give them any? So they put her naked baby in the snow? That's when I snapped. No way was anyone going to touch my baby.

He's 5.
I feel sick.
I so enjoyed 4.
Why does he have to grow up?
Sure, I know I have moments, like this camping trip where I wish I was far far away. But of course as soon as I am far far away, I find myself sniffing his sheets and snuggling his pillow because even though it smells like bad breath, I miss him. Desperately.
I hate thinking of the future.
Because I know he has to grow up.
I know he has to leave home.
I know he has to get married and I will need to not call him everyday.
Every second.
Demanding a kiss or snuggle.
And that breaks my heart.

Here's to being five.
I pray it lasts a lifetime.

missing you

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Wed, 26 Aug 2009 14:32:00 +0000

every once in awhile it bothers me.

that we aren't close.
that you can't let go, you can't forgive, you can't just let me be me.
i can't apologize for disappointing you, because i haven't done anything wrong. except live within your control.
i am so genuinely sad.
i understand that life is to be filled with heartache, especially for those who are called to follow.
i realize that i am being protected by this lack of relationship, that i would hurt ever so much more were we trying to be closer.
i realize that my heart can only handle so much.
and that's why i've stopped trying.
but sometimes, sometimes i wish you would just pick up the phone, or have me for coffee and actually listen to what i'm saying.
that you would actually like me for who i am.
not that you need to.
but it would be nice.

i see the photos of all of you and you look so happy and ...a family.
and i don't have that.
i just avoid all of it.
am i a coward?
or am i just too tired to deal?

my own little family of three makes up for all of it.
i couldn't be happier.

but sometimes...
oh sometimes...
i miss you desperately.
or maybe i just miss what i thought we once had.

couples camping

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Wed, 26 Aug 2009 13:42:00 +0000

It was a good camping holiday.
Rockstar hubby and I are so used to shooting the lower Pet over a period of 3 days. We pack up all the canoes, safety equipment, first aid kit, helmets, food, tent etc and haul a few other couples to canoe camp with us. It’s an exhausting trip which requires a lot of bravery and skill. Not only do we need to stay up late the night before to pack everything, we get up at 3am to pack the car, put food from freezer to barrel packs, grab a last latte, and meet at Antrim for 5am. By leaving at 5am, we get to our put-in at Lake Traverse for around 9. After a quick ‘how to canoe’ recap, we’re off. Exactly one hour after paddling calm waters and listening to couples’ bicker, we hit the rapids. And from then on, we just give’er. Right until suppertime, in which RSH sets up the fire, boils water and cooks supper, while I set up our tent and whatnot. We eat, do dishes and then crash at 9 because we have to get up at 6 the next morning to get an early start. It’s a total of 50km that we have to paddle. And on the last day, we hit the three long lakes, in which, it always rains, pushing us further away from our destination. Then we go home. It’s exhausting. While it is fun, very very fun, and it’s fun to hang out with the other couples and discuss stuff and experience God, it’s exhausting. RSH and I need a few days to get our focus back because we are so tired. Planning, executing, constantly making sure that everyone is safe. It’s strenuous but fabulous. But we’ve noticed a decline in participants this year. We’ve been doing it for 6 years now. Maybe 7. A mens’ trip and then a couples’ trip. Two a year. Exhausting. And while people usually whine/complain/ask why we don’t do it more often, we just inwardly roll our eyes and say, well, we’ll see. But this year.
Oh, this year.
This year, was very, very relaxing.
We decided after the mens’ trip, to make it a relax trip. There were only 5 guys on the men’s trip, and frankly, as fun as it was for them, it was a waste of our resources and stress. So we picked an area to just walk to, to set up and just hang out. RSH still got stressed about the planning, trying to make sure he made enough coffee (7 pots that morning), make sure the food was cooked, the dishes were washed, the food put away, the garbage tied up...he actually got to play for a whole hour. I found it relaxing because I didn’t care. If people were hungry, they could help themselves. I actually got to sleep in that morning because I was so tired. And RSH enjoyed it. He said he felt more relaxed. That he needed to relax. So despite the comments of ‘well, while this is nice, I miss doing the trip and running the rapids and I miss the excitement’ (of which I bit my tongue quite hard) RSH and I have come to a mutual agreement that next year, will be a year of ‘doing nothing’ camping. Whoever wants to come, can sign up to take care of some of the food. Of some of the cooking. Because RSH and I are going to do like the other couples did and take off for a walk, or nap on a rock or swim for a lengthy period of time with each other and just enjoy being a couple. Instead of taking care of others.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not trying to be selfish. But RSH works two jobs where he goes and goes and goes. The last thing he needs is to have to go and go and go again.

Oof. I just reread this and realized it sounds like I’m complaining. And I’m really not. I’ve enjoyed every trip. Maybe I’m just getting old....

summertime pt 2

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Sun, 16 Aug 2009 23:36:00 +0000

"Summertime,
And the livin' is easy
Fish are jumpin'
And the cotton is high

Oh, Your daddy's rich
And your mamma's good lookin'
So hush little baby
Don't you cry

One of these mornings
You're going to rise up singing
Then you'll spread your wings
And you'll take to the sky

But until that morning
There's a'nothing can harm you
With your daddy and mammy standing by

Summertime,
And the livin' is easy
Fish are jumpin'
And the cotton is high

Your daddy's rich
And your mamma's good lookin'
So hush little baby
Don't you cry"

I watched the gaffer suck back a bottle of water and as he swallowed, he began to coo. I was transported by 4 1/2 years...

summertime...

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Sat, 15 Aug 2009 15:48:00 +0000

...and the livin' is easy
fish are jumpin'
and the cotton is high.
your daddy's rich
and your ma is good-lookin'
so hush baby
don't you cry....

i love ella.

anyhoo, it's 35C and i just spent 4 hours in the blazing sun, gardening. i don't know what possessed me. i hate the heat. i hide like a little shadow from it. i like it when i'm beside a lake, but at the moment i am not. so i gardened. in full overalls. i cut down all the dead plants, weeded, and bought more plants. i finally bought a butterfly bush, a rudbeckia (really, can you have too many?) some herbs and an orchid for inside. i sweated like a pig, and i kinda liked it. and now for some reason, i'm ready to tackle the kitchen. what is wrong with me?

on the book front, i'm pleased to say that at the moment, the publisher is very excited and i'm waiting for a marketing thing to go through, and hopefully, in a week, i'll have an offer. and then i can share more details. i'm so excited. i keep imagining next Christmas, walking through chapters, and seeing my book. i'm very excited. i can't stop smiling. my sweet friend B, has also allowed me to publish her lovely song which i'm positive was written for me, even though she wasn't thinking of me at the time, to publish it at the beginning of the book. i hope the publisher goes for it. and then she's throwing me a 'seren is brilliant' party. everyone must dress frivolously...i must find my faerie wings....

Weird days...

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Wed, 22 Jul 2009 20:36:00 +0000

you know those days where things are just...weird?

we had a dump truck drop off 15 tons of gravel onto our tarped driveway because rockstar hubby is filling our backyard hole in which we will soon have a patio. i'm very excited. but as the truck went forwards with his dumping, the front of his 'dumper' got caught in the hydro wires. thankfully rsh was there to yell at him to stop so he didn't pull the whole thing down. so then rsh donned leather gloves and rubber boots and climbed to the top of the caught 'dumper' and pulled the wires off. i watched carefully with my fingers on the '911' of our telephone. he didn't die.
then we (the family minus dog) went to go look at another house on the water. yes, i know we can't afford a house on the water, and no, we are nowhere even close to moving because, well, it would hurt financially. we've only been in our house for two years. how smart would it be to move? anyway, this house has 180' of riverfront property, plus 360' long to the end of the road. there's plenty of room to build an additional house and my dream-greenhouse. and it's a bungalow. that is weird. the two porches are sadly rotting. there are some strange bugs everywhere (I'm guessing he leaves his porch lights on all night) and the living room is the colour of mustard. not my favourite yellow, but whatever. the bedroom is a honkin L-shape, that steps down and there's no closet. the kitchen is weird, the dining room is weird, weird, weird, weird. and expensive. we're actually debating it...but would he knock 75$ off so we could afford to lift it and put in a walk-out?
then we went to the grocery store and rockstar hubby forgot wallet. he had to go back. then we ran into our favourite bakery-girl, Lisa, and she was shopping. looking very sick. with a shaved head under her hat. oh no. turns out she found a lump three weeks ago and in the past week, it's grown aggressively enough to attack all of her lymph nodes. she needs to undergo 5 operations, plus chemo and radiation. she's 36. i felt sick.
when we got home there was an email waiting for me from 'said' publishing house. they had been late getting back to me due to other book emergencies etc. but she said my revisions were 'seamless' and 'brilliant'. she'll push the book in a few weeks at their meeting and i'll know hopefully by the end of August. so i'm excited, but now i have to wait again. i think i'll start working on the other book for now.

i'm sorry to say that our week's holiday was not as great as expected. it rained every day save two days at the cottage and it was not warm out. rsh had to paint the cottage so it was constantly smelly (for some reason 'tremclad' was purchased to paint wood outside), family did NOT get the 75 subtle hints about wanting to be alone and there was guilt flung mercilessly at us. but the pipolinka and trip to the market was fun.

this saturday i am headed to watertown(down) with my friend to shop. then on sunday i'm off to pembroke for a much needed retreat.
and now i make tofurkey wraps as the gaffer fights off the bad guys.

and another post...

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 03:26:00 +0000

i spent the entire day procrastinating on line, and working on my book. i think i have it figured out. but i'm tired now.

the boys drove up to arnprior for pancakes and an airplane tour. luckily, they go to go in the cockpit and check it out. i played mindjolt on facebook.

tonight the boys had macaroni and cheese and angus hot dogs. i had a bit of both. that was 6 hours ago and i still feel it in the back of my throat.

then we all went outside and they had a sword fight in the circle, while i weeded. after ten minutes i joined them. and then the neurotic dog took off. i called to her right away but then saw it was a bunny. THE bunny. that little bugger who keeps gnawing on my tomatillo leaves and eating my lettuce. 'go get him!' i egged on the dog. and she gave it her all. and then she slipped, head first onto the neighbour's paved driveway. she kept running. and then she stopped. because she was limping.
my poor little girl. i took one look at her foreleg and noticed that it was missing fur. gashes of fur missing. and the skin underneath was hamburger.
oh crap.

she had another cut on her elbow (knee?) and it was bleeding. so after i grabbed a cold cloth and held it above heart level for half an hour, i polysporin-ed it, wrapped it in gauze and taped it. she's left it alone for the most part. i just rebandaged it, still gross looking but she didnt' complain. i let her own my bed because i felt bad.

i kicked her off five minutes later because she managed to pick up some slugs on her backside and deposited them on my bed.
at least i hope they were slugs. i'm having gross visions of my dog picking up worms.

regardless, rsh is missing the fun because he is in the basement with the gaffer, sleeping in a tent.

squelch

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 15:50:00 +0000

two posts in one day.

yes, of course i'm supposed to be editing my book, why do you ask?

i just facebooked a boy i was madly in love with in university. we went on a few dates and then one evening, at a forestry bash, he told me that i was no good for him. that i would want to rope him into marriage and he'd be as miserable as his brother is.

what?

i was CRAZY for this guy. absolutely nuts for him. he left after we graduated to work on some forestry stuff out west.

so i facebooked him. not a lot of info. i was devious and decided to google him.

i found his website.

he's a real estate agent.

bahahahaaaa!!!

"not that there's anything wrong with that!"
but seeing his cheesy smile and his polyester suit and his resume about the grade schools he went to in his hometown and his cheesy wife smiling beside him. the glint of 'badboy' from his eyes...now gone.

actually it's kind of depressing.
after rockstar hubby and i had married, we had run into my ex twice (and i was seriously in love with this man, i think i blogged about him before and i could have/would have married him but thank goodness i didn't because we would have killed each other) and that glint was gone too.
infact at the glebe garage sale i saw another ex, who was standing 25' away, but i chose to ignore him and sneak glances out of my eye as i talked cheerfully to gaffer to show how happy i was (like he'd recognize me in my huge fake D&G sunglasses with the mirrored lenses) and he was...glintless.

as happy as i am with rsh, i could not ask for a better best friend or husband, i'm left wondering...what happens to these men? where's the adventure inside them? where's the rollerblading off of handrails on stairs, where's the trying to be a chef, where's the going to Australia to ski and surf at the same time?

where did they go?

am i squelching my man?

of course there will be grumpiness...

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 11:36:00 +0000

today, was an incredibly weird day. i think the crazies are out. and they always manage to find me.

the morning started off good enough, had a great work out at the gym, got some shopping done for this weekend's adventure camping trip (in which we drive two hours to Pembroke, bike for 12km down an old train track to our campsite, and sleep there for the night) and then stopped at Tristan's because i saw a beautiful dress there last tuesday while on my day-date and was determined to try it on. it looked like...it looked like my Paris dress.
i already have a Paris jacket, but i won't be wearing it if we go to Paris in the spring, but i need to see the gardens...decisions, decisions!

so i went in to try it on and i had the gaffer with me. it's a wrap dress. one of those: here's the skirt and here's two swatches of extra long fabric for you to wrap around yourself. no instructions allowed. so i tried it on. and couldn't figure it out. but sort of. during this time, i had met the flamboyant salesman (would he think i looked fat in my dress?) and was waiting for him to ask me how it fit so he could show me how to wear it. but a salesgirl came over as i was trying on the other one (different colour) and i asked her to come back. she didn't. until ten minutes later, after i intercepted a phone call from rsh and told the gaffer for the tenth time to sit still and take it down a notch (the change room was smaller than a powder room). so she came back as i was dressed and i opened the door.

she looked about 50. wearing tight little jean shorts. and a peach sparkly top. her nails were fake, but not the good kind. the weird wide ones that curl funny. and they were peach. and her legs should not have been wearing shorts and her face looked like she was 70. and she kept touching my arm. it was creepy. so i bought the dress to play with at home (it works!)
at the grocery store, the gaffer was talking non-stop and all i wanted to do was get some underwear. at the cash i finally told him to stand still and not move as my very slow cashier rang through 60$ worth of groceries. behind me was a woman with 4 children. all under 6. she yelled out 'hey!' and began talking to a friend. her baby started screaming. for 5 minutes. the mom didnt' pick her up. now, i don't blame her, but i was seriously going to snap. i stuck my finger in one ear and just breathed. i wanted to turn around and just start screaming, 'shut up! shut up! shut up!' (such a Christian thing to do) but i didn't.

on the drive home, there were weird drivers. drivers cutting me off, drivers telling me to go ahead of them when i clearly could not and i held up traffic about 6 times.

then i crashed for a nap. i slept hard for two hours. rsh was home by then. i almost had two car accidents on the way to the puddlepark (playtime for neurotic dog). we stopped at timmy's for hubby to get a coffee (wouldn't you rather have a nice equator?) and was ambushed by a very large, very...drunk? teenager asking me if i had a smoke. she went and sat down, obviously loitering (big sign under her) looking drab and depressed. i let rsh drive home.

as i made supper i realized i was going to snap. seriously snap. no, not pms time. huh. why? i checked the calender. the gaffer had been out of school for almost three weeks now. my routine of not having him for two full days a week was gone. i have him all the time now and the sitter cut back her hours. i haven't had a day to myself in two weeks. and i haven't gone on a retreat with God since last November. i 'could' have gone last weekend with the women's ministry but rsh was off camping with the men, so i didn't go. huh. i need some serious r & r.

and to top off last night, i couldn't figure out what was going on with my body. i looked. i'll save you the details, but rsh had to go to the pharmacy to pick up some..anti-fungal cream. no, i won't be camping now because i cannot sit on a bike for 12km and not have plumbing.

so do they go alone? do they stay here? i'm so torn.

but i really need to get out of here...

ps: did i mention i was text - harassed from someone living in the yukon?

Freaking out

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Tue, 30 Jun 2009 20:57:00 +0000

My brain...is too full.

I have to have my revisions done by the end of July. Sadly, I am having moments of detesting my book. Of not loving it. So I am going to make myself reread it until I love it again. Which I will. Because I want that offer. Badly.

Rockstar hubby did a tree job for a well-known meteorologist guy and talked about my book. He said that when and if (you mean 'when') it comes out, he'd be happy to set up a spot on the news to promote the 'local' author.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! platform!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Last night the m.i.l called to talk about our future arrangements of living together. Not all in one house, but in two different houses on the same property, possibly joined together by a garage (were we to build to spec). We've always agreed that we would take care of them when the time came. We figured we had awhile. But m.i.l wants to move sooner than that.

Huh.

And last night on the mls, we just happened to find three very cute homes on the waterfront.

Huh.

That we could probably afford.

Huh.

But I love my house. But it's the waterfront. But I like the area we live in. It's only 10 minutes from here. But I won't have as much privacy. That's why you set up schedules and build fences. But...but it's your job to take care of them...

my brain hurts.

Huh.

breathe in, breathe out

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 21:35:00 +0000

ok, ok, ok.

so a publishing company has contacted me after I had given up all hope and was ready to move on, and they are interested.
they want me to revise my book to make it, get this, more Christian! how cool is that?
they also suggested some very cool illustrations for it, in which I totally agreed.
my revisions are needed for the end of July. oof. but I can do it. well, WE can do it. :)
and then, just maybe, I'll get an offer.

from a lovely source, there's a good possibility....

yay!!!

Baby, it's warm outside

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 17:58:00 +0000

It's been a cool June, with the exception of a few weird days. Which I've been fine with. This week? Highs of 30's all week. Which means a challenging but super-fun camping trip for the boys. Rockstar hubby is taking 6 other men down the Petawawa for their annual trek. Not as many men this year, having dwindled slowly from 32 the first time they all went over 6 years ago. It just means less rushing, less cooking and less stress. There is a possibility that it won't even happen next year. Who knows?
The gardens are looking good. I'm having serious issues with my tomatillos as the same beetle that devours my chinese lantern, seems to enjoy munching on tomatillo leaves. I have already picked off and killed 20 (may I say that strangely enough, they were all captured in sets of two? You can guess what they were doing) and when I looked outside today I noticed the entire top leaves are gone and they are still munching away. Seriously, how does a bug eat that much leaf? Bunch of fatties. So I've dug up all the chinese lantern plants out front (how they got there is beyond me) and I'm seriously considering digging out the ones that run along my back cedar wall. I'd like to say that they are normally pretty, but how pretty are skinny, twiggy orange blobs? Not very. Sure I could 'try' using insecticidal soap, but seriously? I'm too lazy. I'd rather dig them up. They irritate me anyway. And I've tried drowning them in an old vase filled with water (don't ask) and adding 'oxyclean for your carpet pet stains' and that didn't kill them. I doubt some yellow Sunlight is going to do the trick. And I don't use Sunlight. I use some kind of watermelon Dawn with antibacterial cleaner blah blah in case I happen to miss the raw chicken goo stuck to my glass.
On a personal note, work has been...too busy. Too much tree work and not enough family quality time. I'm noticing that rsh and I are bickering a bit for no good reason. Time for some time I think. It's so easy to get caught up in working hard in the summer...especially when the work is there.

Off to clean the upstairs room in the cool of my house. Air-conditioning can wait until 4pm...

Yes! I'm Behind for goodness sakes!

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 19:00:00 +0000

Pbbttt!

Ok, so last week we went on our second family vacation. We don't count going to the cottage because we're only going an hour away and we can rush home if we need to, or drive half an hour for my latte fix :)
Last Monday, at 8am, we found ourselves packed to the gills in my ford focus, driving to St.Catherines. Nearest Niagara on the Lake.
I aquired a lovely friend about 8 years ago while waitressing (oh I miss those days..) who turned out to be a wine rep. He and his lovely wife, now own a vineyard. A tiny one, a charming one, but a vineyard nonetheless.

I'm pleased to say I drove the entire 6 hours (with 3 stops for food, peeing and a quick video game) as rockstar hubby was a tad sore from running the half marathon the day before. I would like to take a moment to brag that he did it in an hour and a half? Top 2% thank you very much.

So we got there to A & R's and immediately attacked Starbucks for a fix and began to unpack. The afternoon was left open to just hang out and chat. The gaffer had a 3 year old to play with so despite the few squabbles, it went well. And they got us addicted to the Bachelorette (No!!) and yes, we are following it closely and most of our conversation (rsh and I) the other morning was about the psychotic-ness of Dave.

The next day, Tuesday, rsh found himself cutting down their tree. Which was part of the plan you see. Manual labour for free room and board..and wine. Lots and lots of wine. Which meant a whole three glasses because I am a silly pants when it comes to wine. And they lovingly donated their Easter chocolates for my other fix. May I brag that it was not cheap chocolate, but the proper Lindt bunny kind? Oh, I was in heaven.

On Wednesday we got a fabulous tour of their winery and vineyard, in which I am not disclosing anything because it's none of your business, unless of course they harass me to brag about their winery. It was so CLEAN! I know that makes no sense, but I figured it would have, you know, gunk in the corners. But R is a clean freak and I suspect A as well (he irons his jeans!) and there wasn't any gunk in their corners of their bathrooms (did I mention I'm thinking of getting a cleaning person to clean my bathrooms?). Then we packed up and drove to:

THE GREAT WOLF LODGE

Dude. It was fantastic. However, we stopped at the shopping outlet mall first because I needed a fix, and gaffer was...sad that I was leaving him. Ok, I figured, he's tired. An hour later, the boys picked me up and we went. We even managed to get a room right away. It was awesome. Two queen sized beds, side by side, two tv's and a sitting room. We threw on our swimsuits and headed for the water park. Wow. All I can say is wow. It's enormous. And fantastic. And warm. And the waterslides rocked. And they had an arcade. In which rsh would routinely ask if he could go play 'Deer Hunter' as I watched the gaffer.
But the gaffer wasn't well. He was crying. And warm. Too warm.
Thursday morning I sent rsh to get a thermometer and some tylenol. Gaffer had a fever of 102. For three days.
So we packed him full of motrin and tylenol and once he began showing signs of life, we dragged him to the water park (I'm such a great parent)
And I shopped.
I spent two hours in Coach.
But I didn't buy anything.
And I went to the US, all by myself. Boy, was I given a hard time.
But I didn't buy anything. Nothing. Hard to explain that to customs. But I really didn't.
Friday, we drove home.
And got caught on the 401 for two hours. Oof.
We got home 8 hours later.
Yech.
Saturday morning took the gaffer to the hospital.
Ear infection.
Oops.

He's recovering nicely.

We're going back in November...

Freakin' Out

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Sun, 17 May 2009 00:05:00 +0000

I found a web-site where HC is taking open submissions. Everyone can read your book, and if it catches their attention, they'll read it too.

My heart. The gaffer is my heart. But my book is my heart. I feel so vulnerable and afraid. It's not that I don't think my book is good enough. I know it is.

But what if this turns into another rejection? It's my heart.

news, news, and more news

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Fri, 15 May 2009 13:34:00 +0000

First of all, we are being SUPER blessed with all the tree work. Actually, it's a little scary because I've managed to forget everything I know about time-management (which I admit, is not a lot, but still), I'm booking jobs in July, which means I've dealt with some very angry customers. Which I have taken personally. And managed to eat an entire chocolate bar to calm down afterwards. I've since stopped that. HOWEVER, on wednesday, rockstar hubby was rockin' a honkin tree job (two days to complete!) and everyone was working in the backyard. At 5pm I got a phone call. Someone, we figure a rubber-necker, drove by rsh's car and trailer, was too busy watching what they were doing in the backyard and took a swipe at his car. The car door and panel have been smashed in, as well as a dragging swipe up the front. And then the culprit took off. And no one saw anything. In a 40km zone. In a quiet neighbourhood. BUGGER! I was hoping at least the insurance company would say the car was undrivable and would lend me a convertible and rsh would borrow my car, but the arrogant, tattoo-covered, late-getting-to-work, 20 year old said the car was fine and it would be 1700$ to fix. !!!!! Yes, we have a 500$ deductible, but if you're going to be a dink AND not give me a car, then we shall check our other options. And all they were going to do is pound out the dent. Doesn't that mean the door is weaker?
Other news, rsh's grandma, is finally going into a nursing home. I want to point out that she is 93, is losing her mind, and lives alone. She has taken to getting dressed and waiting for her bus, outside, at 3am. And calling people in her church directory at 4am, asking when they were going to pick her up for church. So, she is going to a great home. And it is really stressing out rsh's mom, (best m.i.l ever!) but it's for the best. They will be cleaning out her apartment. Which made me uncomfortable, but m.i.l was matter-of-fact about it. And I was offered...the piano.

I am 35 years old.
I have always wanted to learn to play the piano.
Always.
But we never had money for frivolties like that.
I'm getting a piano.
It's not a baby grand or anything, it's a wall piano, but it'll be mine.

I am very excited.
And of course the gaffer will be taking lessons. And ballet in the fall. And yoga classes. All to prepare him for football.

rut, rut, rut

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Tue, 12 May 2009 14:08:00 +0000

oof, am a little behind...

Speaking of ruts...yuck. It's sunny out. I have a new dirt pig. She still needs a name, but nothing comes to mind yet. I've given myself permission to play outside today. And yet...

blah.
blah.
blah.

Mother's day was wonderful. The gaffer and rockstar hubby made me breakfast in bed (croissants, brie, strawberries) in which the gaffer ate most of, and then I was given my gifts. The gaffer handed me a 'recipe' book of his jk class. I was like, ok, I never gave in a recipe, but ok. So I opened it and the index had a meal and the child's name beside it. So I went to my son's name, which was under 'hot chocolate'. This is what it said:

"Hot Chocolate
By Jackson

A little bit of soy milk

1) The first thing you do is pour some soy milk in a sippy cup all the way tot he top and mix it all up.
2) Then put it in the microwave for 5 minutes and if it's too hot just wait and then you dirnk it all up. (If it doesn't have the white thing under the lid that keeps it from leaking then you have to drink it slowly!)"

Of course I cried! It was adorable!

And then rockstar hubby gave me two presents. He bought me the Kerastase (sp?) oleo-relax serum for my crazy coarse hair and a new purse! The purse is something I saw about 4 weeks ago and said I liked it, and that was it. He remembered! It's gorgeous. Not expensive of course, but it's a beautiful dark cherry red. And it's huge! Now I can carry all my crap around!

But...blah.

I feel...like I need something amazing to be excited about. Maybe I'm just...I think I'm feeling really frustrated about my book. Yes, all I have to do is pick up my reference book, do some more research about where I can send it in, but...I really want closure you know? And I'm having a hard time writing. I'm sending the gaffer off tomorrow to the sitter's so I can take time to write AND write my pseudo-dirt pig...I'm hoping that while biking along the parkway I'll become inspired but we'll see.
I'm just going to go outside now.
Paint my bench a silly blue.
Plant my carrots and weed the dandelions (friggin friggers).
Stare at my peas and beans and wonder how I'm going to stake them without it being expensive or ugly (I told rsh that I love his help, but I'll do it this time. I don't want another contraption attached to our outside wall)

Maybe I'll just dye my hair dark brown tonight. I did it about 8 weeks ago, but for some reason my hair sloughs off all colour and wants to remain a weird mousy brown at the roots and a strange orange-red-brown for the rest. Ech.

addictions

noreply@blogger.com (Serendipity) — Sat, 18 Apr 2009 23:41:00 +0000

I've had a pretty interesting past couple of days.

I'm pleased to say that rockstar hubby and I had a date on thursday, but only after he finished a tree job that he didn't finish from the day before. While I am giving accurate width results of the trees in question, I have been instructed to bring along a 3 foot stick to place at the base of the tree, so that RSH can figure out how big it is. No, I am not wrong, he just wants to 'see it' (on that note, i tried it out today, and left it on the jobsite...)
So we met and scooted downtown to the market and the large mall. We walked, we talked, we held hands, bought cheap Lindt chocolate bunnies (after Easter sale) and discovered...our new...favourite...restaurant.

Mambo.

We had a coupon. We got there and requested the patio, as Thursday was a lovely sunny day and whoever smoked near me was going to get it. We got there early and received the menu. I ordered the something salad which consisted of arugala, blue cheese, pear, caramelized cashews, chicken and covered in a sweet balsamic sauce which was reminiscent of Infusion's sauce on their bruschetta...it was amazing. And they have so many more things to try!

Then he let me buy him a gigantic pair of sunglasses that are so metro, they look ridiculous. And I let him buy me a fake pair of D&G which look fantastic.
Then he went to work, and I picked up the gaffer.
Yesterday morning...the boys went to cosmic, after dropping me off at my first Moksha yoga class.
Dude.
It had to be at least 40C in there. I just sat there quietly for ten minutes and I was already sweating. The yoga was hard, it was painful...I think I'm addicted. I'm a bit sore today, but I found my body wanting more. So tomorrow I will attend another 5$ intro class before church and get my fix. RSH is tres sweet to come home early to bring gaffer to church so I can attend with my friend Gigi.

Today I looked at 4 tree jobs. One of which, really, really bothered me. This guy, George (not his real name) was a piece of work. First of all, he never answers his phone. But he calls you back immediately. And I think he's technologically challenged because his voice mail consists of a hang-up when you leave a message after the beep. So then he gives me crap (a la phone) that I never answer my phone. I explained very professional-like (as I wiped gaffer boogers off my shirt) that if the phone picks up right away, we're on the other line. He didn't believe me. So he left me instructions to look at the tree in the backyard, and the one beside the driveway. I get there...he has two driveways. I kid you not. And his backyard has four trees. So I had to call him. I didn't want to, but I had to. He shows up 5 minutes later in a big expensive pick-up (jackrusselterriersyndrome) and jumps out and is 5' tall (jrts) and brings a creepy co-worker (jrts). I explain he has two driveways. He says, 'oh do I?'

Dink.

So as we walk to the backyard, I notice his german sheppard tied up to the doghouse, in a kennel area. And she cowers away as soon as he comes in the yard. Hm...and then he says in a growly voice "what are you doing Chloe?" and she begins to tremble and climbs into her doghouse. Then he mutters something about 'how she must have gotten into something" and I'm thinking, how can she? She's tied up, idiot. So I looked at the second tree, while two creepy men looked at me (no the Gabbana's were NOT coming off my face) and I left. And the poor dog stayed hidden.

Am seriously considering calling Humane Society. Why on earth would a dog act like that?

Ok, now I'm angry and depressed. Am going to read Cooking Light mag and copy recipes...

Incidentally, I'd be including internet links, but I don't know how, and it doesn't work for me...